Birthdays are important to me.

This was not always the case. It wasn’t until I became a performer at children’s birthday parties that I truly began to appreciate them.

After going to, http://www.pokemybirthday.com/, I   can truly say, I’ve never thought about my birthday in this way. Thanks for the info Poke My Birthday and here’s the story they told me once I put in the day I came out of my mother’s who-who!

You think your birthday is the oldest day of your life history but you are sadly wrong. Let’s surprise you:

310 days before you are born (-310 days), your father has produced the semen that will be half of you soon. He produced 1000 sperms every second of his life and you will be the lucky one out of 500 million sperm he sent on their way in the conceivement. You may find it interesting to know that if he had drunk (or not drunk) coffee on this morning, you might born completely as someone else (for instance in the opposite sex) as caffeine changes the speed of male sperms.

(Your birthday -295 days):

Today your mother had her last menstrual cycle and started building up the egg, which will be the other half of you.

After today, she will not have this cycle again for a very long time (thanks to you!). She spent the day as moody, anxious, short-tempered and you should be glad, you were not around her that day!

(Your birthday -280 days):

Your mother’s egg is ready to build the other half of you and your father and your mother got together to make you. But there is still no “you” around so don’t get excited too much. It can take several hours for your father’s sperm to reach your mother’s egg and now it is just on its way out.

(Your birthday -279 days):

Out of 500 million sperm on their way to your mother’s egg, the sperm which built you has won the race by coming in first and the sperm and the egg became one to make your very first cell. Do you see how lucky your half (the sperm) is by winning coming up first among 500 million other rivals? Never say you are not lucky anymore! We can call –279 days as your “first day alive” because this is when you are a living entity, an embryo, congratulations! Although you are just a 1-cell creature today your unique DNA is also formed so your future destiny, like your sex, height, physical appearance, intelligence, characteristic and vulnerability to certain diseases is already been determined.

(Your birthday -265 days):

If your mother is an intelligent women, she would have suspected that she is pregnant on this day. She is not very sure yet but she is suspicious. We hope she was excited and overjoyed, not worried.

(Your birthday -258 days):

Today your mother is telling your father about her pregnancy and he is celebrating to be a daddy! Today is also important in that, your heart has pumped for the first time today. We don’t know if it is a coincidence that your father learned about you in the very day, your heart first pumped!

(Your birthday -182 days):

Your parents could have lawfully got an abortion until today so this is also an important day of your life. Today they decided you should live! We are glad they didn’t otherwise; we’d lose one site visitor in pokemybirthday.com (and at http://hollywoodclown.wordpress.com/ )

(Day 1 Your birthday):

You are born to a cruel world. Happy birthday little buddy! We hope you remember to enjoy your life, which was a big journey from day minus 310 to today.

I AM a grateful Hollywood Clown